January 25, 2006

From Rehnquist to Suicide Girls in 3/5ths of a Second

The problem with the internet is that you can end up 180 degrees away from your focus in one click. Here I am, searching for possible transcripts of the Rehnquist confirmation hearings, or perhaps some old coverage of the event and instead I end up at the blog entry of a suicide girl commenting on Scalia and Halloween hijinks at the high court.

My google search begins with “rehnquist +transcripts” and halfway down the results page, I get a link to Miss Tyrios’s entry*. Of course my curiosity gets the better of me, and seconds later I’m watching soft-core porn of hot tattooed girls. In addition to blogs, photosets, chat-rooms and interviews of (mostly male) bands and musicians, there are now videos you can watch online or download to your uh… video gadget. Though the idea is kind of cool, the videos are lame, non-specific interviews interspersed with shots of of a suicide girl posing for flashing cameras while generic metal-ish grindcore music blares away asynchronously. It’s always kind of awkward to watch a video of someone posing for a still shot. It makes me feel like I caught someone popping a zit or taking a pee. What they ought to do is discuss their proposals for how the Democratic National Committee will re-take the house, legislation to strengthen food safety, or debunk the political theory of sole executive power while moshing to the brutal music that’s playing- or switch up the music for some Debussy, which would more accurately reflect the bathub/recliner musings of girls like Cricket, Stormy and James as they recount their semi-truck conceptions, travels with minstrel-families, and stories of bygone days of drug-use.

Something about suicidegirls.com used to make me hot- they were so edgy and non-mainstream but now it just kind of bums me out. Though I was psyched to find at least one of them blogging about my current topic of interest, clearly you don’t get to be a suicide girl by geeking out about Rehnquist, Souter and Scalia, but by spending a lot of time on your hair, make-up and tats.

*Miss Tyrio has disappeared from the Suicide Girls website as of 3/12/05.